After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
Randomize
