It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
Life is so much better after having sex.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
Randomize
