Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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