Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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