Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
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