a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
The bartender told me the best pick-up line was to look deep into her eyes and tell her your gonna flick her vagina
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Randomize