Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
Randomize
