talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
Randomize
