we have pet lesbian snakes
I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
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