with your own penis?
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
Randomize
