Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
He did a backflip because drugs
Randomize
