i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
