Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
A+ Viking dick
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Randomize
