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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
only you would photoshop your dick
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Randomize
