Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
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