Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
