your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Randomize
