That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
Randomize
