i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
