Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize
