dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Randomize