All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
