Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
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