I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
Randomize
