We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
