youre lurking in front of me
she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
