there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
Randomize
