I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Even the bartender felt bad for me
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize