I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
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