Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
Randomize
