Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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