So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
Randomize
