Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
Randomize
