Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize
