Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Randomize
