when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
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