i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
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