she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
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