my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
