do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Randomize
