Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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