White coat. Heels.
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Come on in and take your pants off
Randomize
