Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
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