I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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