it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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