Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
I need moral support for this bender
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I think a kid would responsible me up
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Randomize
