2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
