Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
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