he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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