But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize
