I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
